Happy Father's Day:)

Dear Emmia and Kirk,

 What is the first step of change?

Some say its taking the first step, others say you its your purpose. 

Some say its the planning before, and others don't even think its spontaneous cause they just do it impulsively

 What about you?

For me, the first step to any change is. . . (drumroll please). . . love. I know I know it sounds super cheesy. . . but this isn't just any kind of love. Its the love I know that comes from my Father in Heaven and knowing I am a daughter of God.

I'm still not the best at trusting Him but I know Heavenly Father loves me and that love has helped me to change; to become more than I ever was.

Any sort of love is powerful and motivating. Just think of all those love stories out there. Romeo and Juliet (their love kind of killed them), Pride and Prejudice, Beauty and the Beast, The Host.

what about all the non-romantic stories. Brother Bear is a good example of that. How to Train Your Dragon, Big Valley(shout out to mom! Woot, woot hazah for family love), and Despicable Me are others just to name a few. 

But whats the biggest love story that is central to all human history? 

The love of God, our Heavenly Father for His children.

He sent His Son

He Sent His Son Children's songbook pg. 34
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Fbmj2bHIv8

to die for us and raise with living breath. . .

So when you feel like you can't change, that you're too far, too deep and too lost too make a difference or that you don't deserve a better life. Remember Him.

And remember the One who sent Him.

Do you feel it? That love? That unconditional love that motivates you to do anything; to climb the highest mountain or go through trials and tribulations or just to get out of bed and help someone that needs you.
This love changes us. This love is why we are even here; why we have this beautiful earth, animals, life, hope, faith, families. This love is, to me, the meaning of Father's Day.
So this Father's Day remember all the dads. But most importantly remember the Dad that gave His Son for you and is watching over you and hearing and answering the prayers you whisper when no one else is there.

Answered Prayers

God loves You!!! Remember His love.

Love, 

   Ryn

My Father.

Dear Emmia and Kirk,
My past wasn't typical which I'm sure is true for everyone. My past includes an abusive father, divorce, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and my family that got me through it all.

With a past like this it tends to still affect me. I don't want it to but it does.  For me there are a lot of unanswered questions. Most of them start with why. (my favorite question as mom can attest to)

At times I have asked: Why did my dad abuse us? Why does my past keep coming up to effect me?

Which leads to: Why is there so much violence in the world? Why do I have to hurt for other peoples choices?

But they remain unanswered.

I don't have to know why my father inflicted so much violent abuse on a tender family and chose to do all of the things he as done.
I don't know the reason why I grew up fatherless.
I don't have to know why my father chose not to be a father to me.
I don't know why my family still struggles emotionally and financially because of what one person did.
I don't have to know why there is so much pain and hurt from abuse. . .

because I know the cure. My Savior, Jesus Christ can mend anything. He is the comfort I seek when the nightmares come and my self-esteem is broken. He is the hand I hold when I go through a flashback. His is the face I see when memories invade.

 

Through Jesus Christ I know I have a Father in Heaven. He loves me. He has been there when my earthly dad was screaming at us, when he was beating up my family in front of me and when these mental wounds have reopened with every flashback.

In my mind my father is not my father. He abused and hurt my family and me. He didn't act like a father.

My God is my Father. He knows me better than I know me.

 2 Corinthians 1:3
Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort;

 He will give me what I need exactly when I need it to help me be what I need to be to help others in need.

 These two talks have helped me look for healing and help. They have reminded me of the simple truths of the gospel that have always been there to heal and comfort me.

"Healing the Tragic Scars of Abuse"

 "Repent that I may heal you"

Sometimes I still wonder why it happened and why it still effects me but I know that Jesus Christ has healed me already and will make everything just in the end. All I have to do is remember that I'm healed, repent of my mistakes and always always look in Jesus Christ's eyes. He is my center. When I focus on Him all the negative tempest of guilt, shame, anger, fear, hate, anxiety, etc. don't matter anymore. Yes that storm is still there but Christ is my focus and only He can get me to the safety of the shore.

Emmia, it is not your fault if someone hurts you. It is their choice. That guilt that you might be holding on to hurts your soul far more than the abuse ever could. Let it go and now that God doesn;t punish you for another persons actions. You are a daughter of God and deserve HIs is comfort and help. All you need is to ask.

Kirk, remember you are a Son of God. It may scare you, if you have gone through abuse, to become like your abuser. I have felt that fear time and time again. Let love be the motivator of your potential not fear. Let God's love push that fear away. Love yourself into God's arms and He will be your influence to become like Christ.

Helaman 3:35

"Nevertheless they did fast and pray oft, and did wax stronger and stronger in their humility, and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ, unto the filling their souls with joy and consolation, yea, even to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts, which sanctification cometh because of their yielding their hearts unto God."

 I love you and God loves you and I hope, if abuse (any type) has happened in you life, that you come to the One that can purify you and give you comfort.

Love,
 Ryn.